Helpful hints to The Working Person

By Jahnet de Light
Jahnet is a Tantric Sex Teacher.

  1. Always observe the safe sex rules
  2. Decide on your boundaries and stick to them, no matter how much money is offered or how broke you are
  3. Remember being paranoid is almost as bad as the thing you are paranoid of
  4. As you’ll probably be working for a third of your life, it seems a real waste of YOUR life to spend it hating what you do
  5. The people who use professional sex services are the same people we meet in our own lives, including our mates
  6. YOU are in charge. No one makes you a victim unless, at a certain level, you allow them
  7. The sex business is a career. Very few who start give up at 25, or “just do it for a couple of years”
  8. If you don’t like the idea of this, find another lifestyle
  9. It isn’t all making money (profit) as there are lots of expenses and bills to be paid
  10. Beginners normally work for someone else, i.e. in saunas, brothels, drinking clubs, or for a pimp
  11. Working for yourself i.e. in a flat or running your own escort agency costs money and means responsibility
  12. The police are not out to get you, unless you’re really unlucky. It’s usually your own stupid behaviour that attracts attention and that’s one of the reasons for producing these guidelines
  13. Rich and successful people will rarely take you on for long
  14. Just because you live with someone, it doesn’t make them a pimp. There’s no difference between a whore supporting a mate and a shop girl supporting a mate
  15. A lot of the people who live with or support a person who beats them or forces them into sexwork, have a need for that kind of relationship
  16. Organised pimping is very different from living with a weak or poor partner
  17. As you get older, you discover other work options, i.e. mistress, madame or maid
  18. Prostitution attracts people who like to give, preferring to be financially independent and be the bread-winner. In other words, control freaks
  19. If you want, you can pay tax and be part of the white economy but, for this you must be organised, get an accountant or, better still, ask the help of an accountant who is a client.
  20. Think of the sex business as a career, and utilise the profits you make
  21. Get out of the habit of the daily take. Think of yourself as a business. Start thinking weekly or preferably, monthly
  22. Try to pay yourself a weekly wage. If you employ someone, pay them weekly, and save the rest
  23. Remember there is no sick pay, no pension, so think ahead. You may get sick and you will get old
  24. If you have to lie to everyone around you, you must really ask yourself why you are doing it
  25. If you really hate your job or hate yourself doing it, give it up
  26. Be warned, the sex business is a really tough game and prostitution is the hardest part of it. It is not for everyone
  27. The fact that you can earn more money in one day that your mate can earn in one week, can seriously affect your relationship
  28. If you respect your client, your client will respect you
  29. If you think or treat your client as an animal, they may well behave as one
  30. Misdirected sexual energy often becomes anger
  31. If you piss your neighbours off, they will give you a hard time
  32. Having lots of men going in and out of your premises draws attention. If that’s how you must work, choose an area where no one will notice or nobody cares.
  33. Remember it’s an offence for more than one person to work in a premises, so be really sensible if you’re crossing that line
  34. There’s no point in doing 50 men a week, it will make you want to get out after a couple of months and spend all your money on rubbish to cheer yourself up
  35. Remember: ten men a week is 520 a year. This is a reasonable average
  36. Give yourself a sensible working week. If you work seven days a week, that’s all your time and you will burn out in a couple of years
  37. Look nice, smell nice, dress nice and you will feel nice
  38. Remember, being a slut is part of the fantasy. Start as yourself, play whatever part is wanted, then return to yourself. This will make your performance much more fun
  39. It’s all right to have fun and it’s all right to enjoy yourself
  40. It’s also all right to come
  41. Remember, you are always in control
  42. If things aren’t working out between you and a client forgets the money, stay calm and friendly.
  43. There are good and bad escort agencies. Unfortunately, it’s trial and error from what you choose. Most take one fee in hand. The going rate is about one third and for that, they should have checked out the telephone number before they give it to you. They should also expect you to call them on arriving and leaving the client. Leave the number and address of each visit at home with them, and a good friend
  44. Make sure you have a friend who knows what you do and will support you. In the end, you have yourself and your own strength: trust yourself and your inner feelings, as they will always protect you. See yourself as worthy, what you do as worthy, and let this be known to your friend/s too
  45. With escorting, know your boundaries and don’t drink too much
  46. If you try the clubs, remember it’s often five or six nights a week and you have to drink. The sex fee sounds lucrative but it’s not every night or even every week. You’ve got to get dressed up and often pawed by drunken men till 2 or 3am in the morning, for a small hostess fee. However, if you enjoy going out and drinking, this could be for you
  47. Clubs with a private membership are safer because the club has a record of the clients’ names and addresses
  48. Saunas usually want a massage diploma and they don’t encourage full sex
  49. Being on the street may seem the easiest way of being on the game but remember most of the hunting grounds are someone’s patch girl/boy-wise, pimp-wise, dealer-wise and police-wise
  50. Whichever way you choose, you will have to pay someone, somewhere (like all work). There are a lot of organisations around to help you, if you need it.

Helplines and other legal advice from:

Release, 388 Old Street,
London EC1V 9LT,
Tel 020 7729 9904
SAAFE (See links)
Solicitor John Blandford (Tel: 020 8288 9930; Pager 07659 112 792; sex workers with legal problems only)